Do you remember how you chose me?
Do I ever cross your mind?
Do you think about that choice
As one you’re willing to remake?
Do you have nothing to lose?
Nothing at stake?
Nothing you fear might happen,
If you make a mistake?
Are there people that you tell,
To brag or even laugh?
Are there others you have decided
You would also take?
Have they told or kept it secret,
The ways you took them too?
Their memories of terror,
Stealing sleep, lying awake.
How our hearts ache…
For God’s sake
Tell me why,
In the choice you made,
We didn’t deserve
To partake…
To have to act out another day,
For months it felt cruel.
If I wasn’t yelling or crying,
It was a struggle to wake.
You filled my heart with anger and
You took away my hope.
I can’t remember how many times,
I wished for an eternal break…
Hiding, lying, denying.
Binges, booze, and drugs.
Anything to distract me
From using the emergency brake.
To keep thoughts of
Pills,
Cutting,
Jumping,
As options I wouldn’t take.
You chose to do this to me,
To destroy the person that I was.
And your reason?
Just because?
To Choose A Happy Heart 